How low can one go

Here's a bit of fiction I wrote for Vice. It's pretty much all made up. But seriously... have you ever had a nightmare neighbour? I wanna hear stories.

Waiting for my bestie Ronit to roll in from Toronto. Very excited. Going to show her around my favourite place in the world. Aiming for the Richmond Night market (aka heaven on earth) this weekend and lots of beaching. Also, looking for easy camping destinations. I've lived here for 11 years and have never been camping, not once. Oh and y'all should check out the Biltmore on Tuesday. Stop Podcasting Yourself is doing a live show. Yeah, that's all I got to say.

Yuck

I know enough about design to know my current layout is really ugly. I messed something up with html and my awesome nerd whiz neighbour is currently picking up a foster cat so she can't be at my side during this dire time. I will try not to freak out and vacuum instead.

To distract you from the ugly lay out, I've included a photo of me unsuccessfully trying to reenact that scene from that 80s movie where the girl gets out of the pool. Anyone know which one I'm talking about because I'm drawing a blank on the name or whether it even existed. I want to stress this was an unsuccessful attempt.

I feel bad about not posting a podcast but I've been really busy having a fun summer. I've never really enjoyed summer in this city because I spent a long time working evenings and weekends. I decided to try and make the most of it this time since my schedule is much different now. But I'm slowly getting things together and when things come together a bit more, they will surely be good. I should also let it be known that I'm working on various projects, in various stages, so it's hard to keep really focused all the time. So there you have it.

UPDATE: Sean and Karen are hands down the best neighbours/friends ever. I will dedicate a book to them one day.

Group Hug

A Steinberg, Finlason, Jacot, Lev co-production. Marie Pierre is an alter ego who's a hyper-sexual, androgynous Cirque du Soliel reject.

Illustration, voice, writing, animation and editing: Sarah Steinberg (Check out her other animations. They're funny and very observant.)

Marie Pierre Concept: Chris Jacot and Elianna Lev

Hair, makeup, wardrobe, photo direction: Matthew Finlason and Chris Jacot

Look Out World

See the hot blond girl in the middle? Her name is Ali Liebert. Get used to seeing her around. And don't say I didn't call it...

I had a really productive weekend, that included, but wasn't limited to, a) attending the best Laugh Gallery show I've ever attended (I was totally blown away with Trevor Boris, my dear Porno's colleague on VOT...I never gave that show much credit) b) listening to serenades on the fiddle...




c) buying a sweet gold mess choker and most importantly d) attending the wiener dog races. Hello? Wiener dog races?!







Aw, my new friend.

Oh, I have a friend whose heart is a bit sore now and I advised her to do the following. Pick your favourite love songs on your iTunes and arrange them from happiest to saddest. Then cut and copy your playlist and send it to me: noneandonly@gmail.com or leave a comment. I'm doing some research.

Also, if you have any good stories about being trashed while travelling Europe, please get in touch.

And cut

Above is a picture of two of my closest girl friends, Lizzie and Natalie. They are my British birds. Two of the most beautiful women I know. We hadn't hung out together in a while, cause well Natalie is busy raising two beautiful children (she just gave birth a few months ago) and Lizzie is busy studying to be an animal doctor and I'm busy living like a 22-year-old. Anyhow, they make me happy.

I wrote this for Vice about two talented young fellas. Actually, they're really talented and I feel bad I didn't get a chance to stress that more in the article. But visit their website or check out their shows to see for yourself. I really love writing for Vice because they give me full creative feedom and let me write whatever I want and my editor believes in me and pushes me and I usually end up exposing way more of myself than I want but I'm a slave to my craft. In a good way. I always feel really weird and exposed after an article is published because so much is left to be interpreted. I mean, I'm writing satire and a lot of it is juiced up for entertainment but at the same time, my name is attached to it and a lot of people don't get it. Like my dad. I recently did an interview with this up and coming animator (actually I wrote about him for Vice a while back) who worked on children's animation for a long time and then did this thing for Spike and Mike. I asked if that's affected his career in any way. He said his reputation is built on professionalism and work ethic more then content. I've been thinking about that a lot lately.

My interview fell through tonight so the podcast won't be out for a little while. I spent a lot of time in Richmond today, shopping for my apartment, so at least I'm being productive.

The Master

So my dear friend Matthew Finlason came over last night and did what he does best: Rearranged things in a way that looks nice, while making me feel better about myself...eventually. He's fucking ruthless and makes you feel like a piece of shit during the whole process but it's all for the greater good. As a sceptical journalist type, I question everything he does, especially since I know he makes it up as he goes along. He Twitted about the whole process:


@noneandonly lives like a pig refusing ever to evolve her stale attitudes that manifest themselves in stagnant decor and ignorant energy

@noneandonly to her credit she does allow me to manipulate object to increase the perception of space but not without a fight. She's single

@noneandonly is learning that a woman's clean space and cookies will keep a man because a tight little body only gets him home from the bar

You get the picture.

Anyhow, my place is coming together slowly. I hate living in disarray. Here's some of my favourite parts of my new apartment:


He decided to put my most adorable Red Bean photo above my bed. Something about inspiring harmony and companionship. Or something. I love that print. It was taken by the very talented and posi-core Toby Bannister during an adventure in Japan.


I really like what he did here. He took my ex-boyfriend's skateboard and made it into a shelf. You can't see but one of those books is the Kama Sutra. I used to have it on my coffee table, which weirded people out. Boys picked it up more often then girls did. It really wasn't for shock value...I just really like the binding. When it becomes winter and I need to use this heater, I'll have to put up an actual shelf.

This used to be the central piece in my old place. I love it but now I find it a bit sad, especially since there's some heavy history behind it. Sonja Ahlers painted it. I think it works here. I think. Still getting used to it.

Not loving where the Neko Case poster is...it needs to be lowered. I spent a lot of time making a wall of pictures, with all my animal pictures and paintings, above my couch but Matt didn't like it. I guess it's a work in progress.



One of my most prized possession is my pink elephant lamp. Matt moved it into my kitchen, which was a pretty empty, boring space before. I guess I can dig it.

What does this have to do with the People's Program Project? Not much. Well, actually, Matthew is featured in one of my podcast episodes. Can you guess which one?

I guess this is starting to merge into a personal blog, which I was struggling with but now I think I'm okay with.

Well, I'll tease future episodes: a story about trying to explain an embarrassing ailment to a pharmacist in a foreign land, a chat with the very popular man-about-town and host of Talent Time Paul Anthony, maybe something from Bronx Cheer (if I have the courage to re listen to an interview I did with them for Vice that went horribly wrong. One of my personal worst experiences interviewing ever. Nothing to do with them though...they're very lovely and talented boys), a collab with Jeff Hamada from BOOOOOOOM and an interview and new material from songstress extrodinare, Lisa Joyce Parry.

Porno Von Pornstein

You know that girl who's sometimes on Video on Trial? The really hot one with a big mouth? Yeah, the crazy hot one? Anna Von Frances? Well, her and I go WAAAAAY back. I'm the only person she still lets call her Porno (long story.) I could (and should) probably write a novel about our relationship. That girl is one hell of a human being. I won't go into describing her as there really are not enough words but yeah. She's something else.

Anyhow, she throws parties and a bunch of other crazy stuff. I guess she runs a website too. Anyhow, she sent me a bunch of questions about my favourite spots in Vancouver. I could talk about my love for Vancouver all day. Check it out.

That photo that accompanies the interview was taken by Jon West last year. His talent frightens me. He's one of those rare people who excels at anything and everything he does. Anything he sets his mind to, he masters. He is very, very special. I'm grateful to have known him.

Episode 13 - Let's Go Crazy

To listen to Episode 13, click here.


Back in January, I went crazy. I don't think it was the first time, but it was the first time that I behaved in such a way that several of my closest friends voiced their concerns and I went and got help. I documented the process so I can turn it into something bigger, which will be published eventually. But for now, I've been interested in the idea of going crazy, as it seems everyone experiences it at some point in life.

On this episode we hear two story. The first one is about a friend's decent into madness, which resulted in her doing something very wholesome, for seven days straight, non-stop.

The second story is about what drove my friend to read her boyfriend's diary, twice, and what happened as a result.

I'd love to hear your story about going crazy. Feel free to get in touch at noneandonly@gmail.com

So I'm settling into my place very nicely. It's so amazing to be out of my old place, which was a clusterfuck of noise and motion and non-stop madness. This apartment is peaceful and I'm surrounded by loads of lovely energy. Also, enjoying the Vancouver summer. Some interesting events have been happening, which will definitely be touched upon in later episodes. So stay tuned.